Red, Yellow, White, Green, Christmas is all about color. Isn’t it amazing though; that Christmas really isn’t about color. Everything is what is; and, what it isn’t.
Here’s what I mean.
RED: Blood of Jesus, Holly Berries, Rosey cheeks, fire
Yellow: Fire, Light, stars
Green: evergreen trees, Eternal connection to Jesus, endurance.
Is my life today, what I pictured it would’ve been, a year ago?
No. It’s more raw. It’s full of unexpected events that have taken me on this alter perspective journey.
My outlook on life is more excited, to meet the possibilities. My anticipation for new adventures has risen significantly.
My belief in my ability to achieve a goal, is not only, present, but also, in the premature stages of solidification.
My Lizzie McGuire voice never fails to give me feedback, especially when I don’t want to hear it. Spiritually, I’ve time traveled to different parts of my past, and saw it from a new angle.
I’ve met amazing people! Honestly, I don’t know how I never knew them before. They’re life changing, simply by being themselves. I’ve learned more about the bones and joints of a vehicle.
I’ve accomplished 3 major 2022 New Years Resolutions.. though, one hasn’t panned out as I imagined.
I’ve felt deeper. I’ve succeeded greatly. I’ve sought help; and, I’ve been more intentional.
I watch a Youtuber, who strives to be 3% better every day. I’ve considered that greatly, as of lately. I never want to die the exact same person as I was the day before.
There’s too many people to talk to, subjects to study, hobbies to try, and foods to taste. While there was significantly more change in what this year was vs what I imagined, I am deeply grateful.
Lesson #1: Check your address BEFORE you submit an order. Otherwise, intimate body jewelry may land on the doorstep of an elderly lady.
Lesson #2: Before confidence can blossom a skill, perfection will kill all opportunities.
Lesson #3: Double check orders before buying; or else, you may end up with two of the same LOL doll.
Lesson #4: People who are dealing with heavy stuff (unalive stuff), will have signs of a destructive pattern. (not necessarily something new.. more of a confirmation.)
Lesson #5: In situations when someone is upset with me, I can differentiate where I am and am not in the wrong. Maturity has a way of building understanding.
Lesson #6: People who don’t understand there WILL be conflict between us ; but, so can be reconciliation… Aren’t my people.
Last night, as if right on schedule, our power went out. It was around 10:30, so the entire apartment was black… Except one little light. A light that held more significance than any previous Christmas. Here, you can see the tree lights are off. The star, though, is battery operated.
First, let me show you how God showed himself to me, today. Only but 10 minutes ago, when I decided to share this personal experience with you, did the the gloomy and ugliness of Winter hang around. Suddenly, we have light.. explosion of warmth, serotonin, and beauty.
Roughly two and a half weeks ago, I screwed up my truck. It was already screwed up; but, you know.. it was one of those do the complete job or none at all stupid moments. After a depressing trip to a car center, I returned home with a list of parts that MUST be fixed first. One step forward, leads to two steps back.
Feeling completely defeated, I took to BookFace (If you read this, and think of Dear Momma Tot, you’re my tribe!!). I needed to handle this situation; after all, I created the mess. During this time of parts shopping (my very least favorite type of shopping!!), I decided my girls would start riding the bus. Now, momma bear was hesitant about this because I was concerned about bullying.
After the kids got off the bus, I decided we were going to go to the Dairy Queen. I had my car fixed enough; so , I wanted to go. I was craving their choco fudge. It’s amazing. We hadn’t been there in weeks. It was going to be an extra special treat.
As we tucked out ice cream and hot dogs, I turned left to head back home. This had been the furthest I’ve traveled from my apartment for some time.. I was a bit nervous about it. As I came down one particular street, something came over me. “This is the time to teach the girls about the real meaning of Christmas.” God said.
I heard Him loud and clear. It was so unexpected. The whole experience was surreal. The girls listened tentatively. They asked questions; and, I had answers. I didn’t expect the process to be as smooth and effortless, , accepting and understanding. Calandra said, “So where is Jesus now?” I explained God and Jesus are in heaven. She followed with a list of who she knows that has died.
Aren’t these huge dirty chunks of heavy metal magical?? Hahaha!!
In seriousness, though, I find them amazing. I suppose my admiration was intertwined into my DNA.
I was born in this small Eastern city called Bellaire. At the time of my arrival, Bellaire was still a predominantly industrial area. We had the natural means of travel via tracks and the Ohio River.
I’m so thankful to have come from a place that provided jobs, a future, and more to so many families. My childhood home sat on a hill. All the years I lived there, the background noise was muffled. Life was too crazy.
When I moved, to a new little area, I heard that old familiar sound. The whistle of a train resonated through my window.
Wherever I live, everywhere I go, and whatever is around, I hope for a grand site. Whether it’s The Polar Express, The Christmas Train, Harry Potter, a real life ride, or museum display, I will admire these amazing vehicles.
Kristi Yamaguchi was my favorite ice skater, growing up. Nancy Kerrigan was spot number 2. They danced on ice, gliding and twisting like beautiful snowflakes.
I didn’t ice skate much; but, I did rollerblade. I started with skates, and graduated to the professional wheels. Recently, on TikTok, I watched a few older men enjoy the rink. Oh I was jealous lol. It was then, that I remembered something I’ve recently discovered about myself, that I had forgotten.
I LOVE that feeling of being on that wide open space, free from everything around me. There was an untouchable solitude in swirling through the cool air, while listening to the music.
I’m too old to begin figure skating; but, I am never too old to discover more about me. I may not be on the ice; but, I can watch and admire the beauty of those who are capable.
Honestly, I’m not nearly as cultured in my knowledge of Christmas as I’d like. I plan on reading up on this in the next year. Here’s some great resources that can teach all of us the amazing diversity of this wonderful holiday.