What does that mean? Imagine you’re in a book club. This month, you are assigned The 5 Wishes of Mr. Murray McBride. You have 30-31 days to begin and finish the entire book.
Let’s say you, me, Anne Frank, and Shakespeare planned to meet for brunch and discuss the story, so far. As we get situated, and beginning ordering drinks with pastries, You ask, what page has been your stop?
I’m on page 51. You are midway through 184. Miss Frank is only page 205. Mr Shakespeare is completely finished.
We’re all reading at our own pace. We’re all going through the book with our own personal experiences, thoughts, side note, footnotes, exc.
Now.. imagine Miss Frank comes to me completely livid because she had a circumstance in her life that was super similar to one in the story. I’m empathetic because it’s painful.. but her expectations of my support and comfort will only further upset her… Because I’m not in that chapter. I didn’t live what she did. I’m not in the same place, on the same page as she is. My support and comfort is limited by the lack of personal experience.
When people walk into our lives, they’re operating in the ways, with the beliefs, from their experiences.. They’re not mind readers. They’re not meant to be. They can’t possibly relate to every aspect of your life. You can’t expect them too. They only know what they know.. And that’s all they can possibly offer.
It’s up to you, to understand and accept that fact. This isn’t wrong for you or them. It’s just the way life works.
Have patience. Give grace. Communicate effectively. Be honest and open. Don’t expect more from a stranger than what you yourself could’ve give.
Until next time,